B-log

The calendar turned. I went to sleep in 2011, and woke up at 2012. 

My thoughts:

• Maybe the fireworks everywhere mean something a little more than in most years.  
• I’ve never seen so much of a sense that 2011 was a bad year.
• 2011 was a good year for me, my family. Unemployment ended. New door to serve opened. Much prayer was answered. My faith is deeper, wider, stronger because of 2010-2011. 
• Two of my high school classmates died in 2011. I’m saddened that they will miss so much of life that goes on for their children and other loved ones.
• The United States of America is really pretty amazing. There is such an expectation of hope for 2012. I don’t know if it is political, economic, social or what…but people generally think things are going to be better this year than it was last year.
• Is that a global phenomenon, as well?
• I will be 40 years old this year. How ‘bout that?
• My children turn 15, 13, and 10 this year. Good googlymoogly.
• We miss being near family and Texas friends, but we had such a long time to prepare for our transition that it helped make it easier. And God was so gracious to our children…they transitioned incredibly well and made lots of new friends.
• I heard a song this morning that said something along the lines that God is more real in the pain and need and the waiting. That was our experience in 2011.
• I believe that since God orchestrated the events to bring me and my family to Arizona, it would be foolish of me not to obey him in the little things he calls me to now that I’m here. It’d be like driving across the country to get to a destination, but deciding not to get out of the car once I arrived.
• My analogies will get better as the year progresses…I’m pretty sure of it.
• There’s prophecies that the world will end this year…and plenty of naysayers who think the world will continue in perpetuity. I believe the world will end…someday. Whether it happens this year or long after I’m dead (hopefully many years from now), there’s nothing I can do to change it, so I’m just going to make the most of it.
• I’m encouraged beyond words to meet each week the thousands of people who call Scottsdale Bible Church “home,” because they demonstrate that they are earnestly seeking God. The conversations I share challenge me and grow me. 
• I’m continually learning that love is this miraculous resource that God gives us expressly to give away liberally to others. You never run out of it. You never even run low on it. Perhaps best of all, the more you give away, the more full you feel.
• I’ve never been so full of love, though, that I’ve wanted to stop giving it away.
• This causes me to marvel at the love that God has for every one of us…and for each one of us.
• There’s no shortage of people desperately in need of love.

This one revisits the infamous story of American juvenile delinquent gets caned. And yet another OJ SImpson trial shout out.

July 5, 1994 Reaction Paper #3

      The entire country took notice when the teenager Michael Fay was sentenced to six swats with a bamboo cane for vandalizing automobiles in Singapore.  The U.S. government stepped in, imploring the Singapore government to not cane the boy.  The press was there every step of the way, getting reaction from Fay’s home town, speaking with Singapore citizens, and even analyzing the caning process by speaking to former caning recipients.

      The sentence was reduced to four hits, and Fay was punished for his crime.  Upon returning to America, Fay and his father both stated that they had no interest in speaking about the situation any further, that they only wanted to put the past behind them.

      Accordingly, I was a bit surprised when I turned on the radio the other night and heard the two men speaking with Rick Roberts of KOA radio.   They were on the air to profess young Michael’s innocence.  He claimed that his confession was coerced after long hours of inhumane treatment.  I was not able to listen to the entire show, but before I turned it off, I heard Roberts promote upcoming segments with allegations of U.S. intervention and the Fays’ plans for marketing this story.

I write all of this to speak about privacy.  It may be naïve of me to say this, but I do believe that the media were willing to grant his privacy after his return to the states.  I am guessing that the Fay family saw a dollar amount that they could obtain by re-introducing this story to the public.  By adding some spice and empty threats (they claim that they are going to sue the Singapore government), they hoped to create some interest in their pathetic situation.  So I suppose we should give them some credit, because they were able to find some.

People may or may not be sick of the story, but I definitely think that the media should not be blamed for an invasion of privacy.  The Fay’s volunteered to give up their privacy for this situation.  Several editors decided that there might be a new angle to this story and covered it.  The press is not at fault for this story. 

What concerns me about all of this is how the private citizen seems to want to forsake privacy for exposure.  Ronald Goldman’s mom recently held a press conference lambasting the press for not giving her more coverage.  She cited the L.A. papers for not even mentioning her presence in the city.  She claimed by not giving her exposure, the press was issuing an “implied” libelous statement that she had no regard for the murder of her own son.

Not only do I think this is ludicrous, but also very scary.

It appears that the press needs to worry about the consequences for respecting an individual’s privacy as well as invading it.  The gray line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior seems to get fuzzier when accepted norms suddenly become inherently “implied” libelous.  If this woman continues to mount the soapbox to criticize the press, how many new situations will appear, claiming that the press’ silence damaged their reputation.

With people like the Fays and Goldman’s mother around, it continues to get more and more risky to be an agent of the press. 

New Discovery: These first papers were a series of “reactions” to the events of the OJ Simpson trial for the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson & Ronald Goldman, for the Ethics in Journalism class I was taking.

New Concern: Did I actually believe OJ was innocent? Certainly not…

***

Reaction Paper #2

      With all that seems to be going on surrounding the O.J. Simpson case, I would be remiss if I did not address it.  Since it continues to be a perfect example of many of the ethical issues that we discuss, I will continue to use it to my own advantage.

      We discussed libel in the classroom, and you mentioned that Simpson most likely would not bring forth libel charges if he is found to be innocent.  I definitely understand the logic behind why he would not want to do so, but I think it is a tragedy that the media is not being held accountable for the stories they present as the truth.  The class seemed to determine that it was not viable to fine the offending news source for publicizing faulty reports.  I don’t understand why that cannot be the case, especially in this situation.  If the press is going to the measures that they have, it can be little disputed that it is affecting the public opinion.  If the station that leaked the “existence” of the ski mask were forced to recant its story at the top of the newscast and publicly apologize for their error, then public perception may become more willing to wait until the trial to convict Simpson.

      Surfing over the channels on Friday night, I found myself repulsed to a new depth when I saw one of the tabloid shows dramatizing the Simpson’s saga.  They played heavily on the speculative issues and little on the known facts.  When I got over my shock at what I was watching, I thought about what I had witnessed. When the media produces these dramatizations, the viewer may gain feeling that they are watching reality.  If, in this reproduction, Simpson actually commits the murders, his goose is cooked when it comes to the trial.

      I suppose I am saying all of this to summarize that the media has become the victim of their own manipulation.  In a desperate effort to produce a story, they lost their integrity.  Their desperation may have cost the man his chance and a fair trial.

      Now, though, the defense is using the media to manipulate the public with hopes of fostering sympathy.   The poor ethical decisions of the reporters have resulted in the focus of the story becoming a bit fuzzy.  The prosecuting attorney is now facing backlash because of his release of the 911 tapes.  Because the stations aired the tapes, knowing they would make good ratings, the grand jury was dismissed, possibly turning a small tide in the defenses direction.  If the media is not to be held accountable to a certain degree, then the misdirected stories will continue to be distributed, much to the chagrin of justice and the joy of the American public. 

The many posts to follow are papers I wrote while I was in college and seminary. I’m posting them here primarily as a means of digital archiving. Please forgive any immature expression of thought. I was pretty impressed with myself back in the day. Many years later, recognizing that it’s taking me 20 minutes to cut & paste these old documents…well, let’s just say I’m slightly more humble.

***

      After watching all of the events surrounding the apprehension of O.J. Simpson, I decided that our discussion would apply nicely to his situation.  His arrest, manhunt, and arraignment have all been the focus of the media.  Every half-hour on the radio I hear the latest details of the case, whether it be the search for the murder weapon or the “discovery” of another incriminating piece of clothing.

      This case is already on questionable ethical ground because of the leaks and “unnamed sources” used by the various papers.  Simpson has either been convicted or exonerated by the majority of our entire country.  If every person on this campus were asked, only the smallest percentage of people would not have an opinion regarding his guilt or innocence.  Since the press has raised so many incriminating issues relating to Simpson, I believe that his guilt has already been assumed by a large proportion of this country.  Because of the extent of reporting and use of questionable facts, Simpson may find it exceedingly difficult to obtain an impartial jury in his case.

      When the press found out that charges would be brought upon O.J. for the murder, the television and radio stations all flocked around the courthouse waiting for his surrender.

      As time passed, we viewers were privy to speculation on validity of the charges brought forth by the prosecution, as well as deliberation on the application of the death penalty to the special circumstances of this case.  While some of these ponderings by the media were boring but effective time-killers, I think a question of ethics should be raised concerning the right of the journalists to analyze this case to the extent that they have.

      If Simpson is innocent (which I myself hope but do not believe), the media as a whole has gone beyond the boundaries of ethical reporting.  While the camera shots of his flight down the California freeways certainly made for good television, I found myself waiting for him to tire of the pursuit (of the press, not the police) and shoot himself.  Since he did not commit suicide, the media themselves dodged the bullet of ethics. 

      Though I think Simpson’s attorney, Robert Shapiro, uses the media to manipulate the viewing public, I can justify his actions.  I think that they feel like their manipulative tactics are necessary to assuage all of the negative press he has received thus far.

      Because of this, the issue is raised concerning the purpose of the press.  I think that in this situation, the press is not the vehicle to transport the cold, hard news, but instead is the soapbox upon which both sides profess the guilt and/or innocence of this man.

      I look forward to the upcoming days, weeks, and months of the O.J. Simpson story.  I know I will see further misuse of ethics by the press and I know that it will be justified in the name ratings and revenue.  May the best stations and periodicals win.

What a difference a year makes.

Last Christmas, we were eight months into unemployment, living on my retirement savings. We were on a restricted budget to stretch our resources as long as possible. In many ways, it could have been a season marked by how poor we suddenly found ourselves, full of disappointment with the awareness of what we didn’t have.

It turned out to be one of the most special Christmases our family ever experienced.

We shopped for Christmas presents for one another from the Dollar Store. That’s not a joke or a typo. We combed that store’s aisles for meaningful presents for one another and thought of creative ways to express our love for one another through these inexpensive items. Our children never complained and jumped right in to the spirit of the opportunity, raising our joy in the process. When the gifts were later exchanged, the time was marked by laughter and sincere appreciation for the thoughtfulness and consideration that went in to each and every gift selection.

We worshipped at Prestonwood Baptist church. We were without a church home since being laid off the April prior. We had “settled in” at Valley Creek church in Flower Mound - a great church that we love. But we had decided that we wanted to go to Prestonwood for Christmas worship. There, we were blessed by the worship, especially by the singing of Holly Knight, who we have known from our days back in Colorado when Kelli had babysat Holly as a child. The church gave away hundreds of Nativity sets to children, and Kelsi brought one home as an unexpected, precious gift. 

We were also blessed by dear friends from Grapevine who surprised us with a large bag full of Christmas gifts…for the entire family. Every gift was a treasure. We were overwhelmed by the love expressed by the selfless, generous presents given to each of us. I never felt more like George Bailey than that day - rich beyond measure because of the kindness and love of friends.

A year later, so much has changed. We live a thousand miles to the west in a suburban community where 83% of the population is unchurched. We are part of a thriving church where I am honored to serve as the pastor of local outreach. God has knit our hearts with many people and we’re making new friends. Our children are thriving and finding their place in God’s work here. While it will take years to financially “recover” from the extended unemployment, we are in a much better place, economically speaking. We shopped at “regular” stores. We didn’t “go crazy,” but we were able to buy our children multiple gifts. In most ways, it was back to “Christmas as usual.”

Except that last night, at the end of the Christmas Eve, before Kelli put on her kerchief and I my cap…we spent time talking as a family about the year between last Christmas and this. We reflected on God’s goodness, on his faithfulness, on his provision, on his love and care and keeping. We worshipped him as a family in prayers of adoration, thanksgiving, requests, and praise.

From time to time, in response to good news, we hear people say, “God is good!” I agree. It’s true. What we learned, though, in this past year, is the first-hand experience of what we already knew to be true: In the “bad times” too, God is good. God was good in bringing to an end our time in Texas…though we wouldn’t have asked for it. God was good in drawing us into an extended time of waiting…though we never would have asked for it. He grew our faith and drew us close to another and to himself. God was good in every door he closed and every opportunity he gave to someone else….though I often begged for it not be so. He brought me (and all of us) to a dependence and trust in him that is more valuable than anything available for purchase at a store…and more fulfilling than any job title.

God didn’t give us patience. He gave us a situation that required patience. We had nothing but God. We had no choice but to trust him. The only thing that we had was the faith that he had given us. We held on to that faith, and accordingly, on to him, with all that we had within us. That faith was his gift to us…and he gave it to us to carry us because he is good.

This year, we know no fewer than 4 families who are today where we were last year, financially speaking. We know of dear friends who are hurting this Christmas. I pray for you daily, asking God to bring you through your pain, through your waiting, through your season of need. I also ask God to be real to you in these days, that he draws you near and that in these days that could be seen as “bad,” you will experience first-hand that God is good.

ButGod, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, ⁵ even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— ⁶ and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, ⁷ so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. (Eph. 2:4-7)

Link to the previous parts in the series

The previous entries discuss the shortcomings of trying to rush love, and offer a discussion of how real, selfless love takes times. 1 Corinthians 13:8-13 shows how God reveals himself through true expressions of love.

Love never Fails (v. 8)

What a succinct and perfect message. Love never ends. Scripture declares that God is love, and here it tells us that love never fails. Logic proclaims, therefore, God never fails. When it comes to love, you might have seen a pattern of failure throughout your life because at worst, you’ve seen the inept efforts of human loves. At best, you’ve seen noble godly efforts, but they’re incomplete. When all is made perfect - when Christ comes again - you will understand fully because you will be in the eternal presence of love (because you will be in the presence of God, from where all love issues forth), and you will fully understand love.

Love approaches perfection (v. 9-12)

You can live in love because love gives you a glimpse of the future perfection, the promised everlasting of realized love. Some day, you can see love face to face because Christ is coming again. And when he does, love will be fulfilled. You will never have to settle for the characteristics of love, or the symbols of love, or the shadows of love, because you will be eternally living in the complete glory of true, pure, unmatched and unending love. And when that day comes, the Bible tells us here that you will know just as you are known.

What that means is that you will know love either to the full extent that you live it because of your relationship with Christ, or you will know it because you have to spend eternity apart from it because you are known by the lovelessness in your life. It’s not enough to just acknowledge Jesus. The Bible foretells that every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is Lord. The Bible also says that even Jesus himself said, “Not all who say to me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of heaven.” You will be known by your love. When that day comes, there will be no excuses. No second chances. So the question is, how will YOU be known?

Love makes faith and hope necessary (v. 13)

Faith and hope are two characteristics of love. Possessing either of these without love is pointless. Who would want to have hope in a god who was void of love? Where is the basis of faith if it is not driven by love? This verse says to “abide in these three” (faith, hope, and love). Abide means to rest in, to live in. Live in your faith of a loving God. Live in your faith of a loving, living Christ. Finally, live today, and live eternally in the love of the God who created you and who loved you so much He provided a simple (kind) way for you to have heaven.

The final word is that love trumps faith and love. Love rules. Love never fails. 

God loves you.

Without fail.

Now, go love others the way he loves you.

Recap:

• Intro - making love
• Part 1 - love gives life meaning
• Part 2 - love takes time
• Part 3 - what happens when you hurry love 

Continuing my unintended trend of interweaving this conversation with music videos, here’s a classic “on-topic” song, by the greatness that is Johnny Lee - Looking for Love:

I actually thought it was Mickey Gilley who sang it, but I think he just covered it for the epic John-Travolta-as-the-Urban-Cowboy movie Urban Cowboy.

But I digress. 

Probably many people can relate with the disappointing, depressing, downer realities of this song…of looking for love in all the wrong places. Good grief, I know I did. As a result, I experienced (and expressed) a lot of the “not love” antitheses that are explained in part 3, where God talks about love from the perspective of all the things it’s not. Most of us can identify at least one relationship in our life…maybe current relationship, hopefully past relationship…that was marked by selfishness, arrogance, pride, blame, and/or other ugliness.

God doesn’t limit love by explaining what it isn’t, though. He moves forward and reveals the characteristics of love by what love can do…what it is able to accomplish. In reading this list in 1 Corinthians 13:7, note that none of these accomplishments is instantaneous. They take time. And as such, it shows that pursuing love is a life-long, never-ending quest that is worth the investment and self-sacrifice.

Love Bears all Things

This Greek verb for “bears” (stego) means “to cover.” Compare this bear versus bare, which means to exploit. It means to protect. When you love, you are willing to protect those you love rather than exploit them.

Think about this from a practical application. When someone offends you or hurts you, the normal, natural reaction is to recoil from them and to leave them unprotected to face the consequence of their actions. However, when you love someone, the only appropriate response is to cover them, to cover their offense with grace. 

It’s not just a matter of “putting up with their junk.” It means actively reacting to a wrong with grace. It means approaching others with a disciplined intentionality to respond to their ugliness with kindness, to their tactlessness with mercy, and to maliciousness with love.

Love Believes all Things

When you believe all things in love, it means you opt for the most favorable option. Job’s friends didn’t operate out of love, they blamed him for the problems befalling him. When you love people, you want to believe in the best option possible.

At this suggestion, most people would say, “Don’t be naïve.”  However, this is exactly what God wants. He wants you to be naïve. That doesn’t mean you are being stupid. It means that by faith, you are believing that the other person is capable of something far better, far superior than what is typically expected.

Believe that other people won’t let you down. Believe that others won’t habitually hurt you. Believe that others can overcome their dysfunctions. Believe that God loves these “others” at least as much as he loves you, and what he has accomplished in you he can accomplish in others. You see, in doing this, you evidence much more your faith in God than your faith in these other people.

Love Hopes all Things

“Hope” is so much more than just “wishful thinking” or even “lofty ideals.” In the context of love, “hoping all things” means to place a positive confidence or expectation for that person. It means to expect that failure will give way to success, that Christ will claim victory in that person’s life.  This hope is held in close context to the “belief” in all things. 

Again, this idea reflects more of your belief in God than in the other person. If your hope is in the God who parted the Red Sea, who turned water into wine, who healed the sick, who rose from the dead, and who rescued your soul from hell and placed you into heaven, surely you can expect lesser blessings in God’s work in the life of those you love.

Love Endures all Things

This Greek word for “endures” is a military term that means to hold a position at all costs. It means that for those you love, you are willing to endure their offenses, their rebellion, their violence against you. If you have ever sinned or rebelled against your parents, this very concept is why they didn’t pitch you out the first time you messed up. Truly, this endurance is an unending climax of love.

These four characteristics of love presents an ascending order of the love process. When you love with agape love, you first bear all things. When you feel you can’t bear any more, you continue to bear, but you do so because you believe all things. Then when your belief wanes, it doesn’t cease because you hope for all things. And finally, when you feel as though you can hope no longer, you endure. You endure because you love and while you endure, you continue to bear, you continue to believe, and you continue to hope. That is sacrificial, selfless love and that is what God does with you on a daily basis.

Next: Part 5 - Conclusion, the power of love. (Surely, you can predict the accompanying song)

Admit it, you read that title with Phil Collins singing in your brain, didn’t you?

If you didn’t, you do now.

Then again, maybe you’re a fan of the Supremes rendition.

But I digress.

For review, read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Your love must be expressed (in action, not words) by verbs that are expressions of time.

If it is not, it’s fair to question if your love is really love at all (at least in terms of how God demonstrates it perfectly and empowers you to reproduce). In fact, the next 8 expressions of love (after patience and kindness) in 1 Corinthians 13 are shown in the negative. They reveal the bad anti-love results that happen when you hurry love:

Jealousy is the thought that you deserve the blessings that someone else has received. Jealousy is the outcome of an inflated self-estimation and a disregard of the other person’s circumstances.  You see other’s blessings and you don’t take the time to understand why that person is blessed. It is a sense of injustice and greed that you want what the other person has. In the context of love, it is simply impossible to be selfless and sacrificial while at the same time being jealous of that same person.

Bragging. This word is used only here in the entire New Testament and it is tied to jealousy. When you brag, you are actually attempting to make others jealous of you. This can never be confused for love. Philippians 2:6-8 reveals that Jesus, “who being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross!”

When you love others, you don’t brag about yourself. Don’t ever be motivated by the thought of making someone envious of how swell of a person you are. Bragging brings attention to self and is expression of pride.

Arrogance. Arrogance, like bragging, is based in pride. Arrogance is that inclined nose-snobbery that sometimes comes with a sense of accomplishment . Those people who act holier-than-others are making the grave error of placing their emphasis on their part in any spiritual accomplishment, rather than Christ’s grace, mercy, and presence that makes any accomplishment possible. That snobbish elitism is boorish. It contradicts a loving spirit and turns people away from Christ.

Be more like John the Baptist, who totally subjected himself when Jesus arrived on the scene. John had every opportunity to be arrogant. He was the predecessor to the Messiah; he had his own following of believers. Instead, John confessed that he wasn’t even worthy to carry Jesus Christ’s sandals and he said to Jesus, “I must decrease so you can increase.” John was not arrogant because he loved people and he knew and was secure in who God had made him to be.

Unbecomingness. A simple synonym for this is acting rude. Rudeness comes in so many forms, demonstrating both a lack of love and a total lack of respect. Whether you are rude to people by ignoring them, by replying with smart-aleck answers, whether you belittle them, or are just plain mean or insulting, rudeness is the ugly face that proves that love has no home in your heart.

When you start looking at every person as God’s precious creation, remembering that each person is just as valuable to Christ as you are to him, rudeness is replaced with cooperation, patience, care, concern, and ultimately, Christ. 

Seeking Your Own. Seeking your own is also called selfishness. Much of the time, we make good excuses saying things like. “You know, I really do love people, but I don’t want to talk to them about God (or Jesus, or faith, or church, etc). I don’t know what to say, or I might get rejected. Besides, I have to spend Sunday nights getting ready for work.” What you are doing is putting selfish motives (or fears) ahead of the need of that other person. Imagine if Jesus had acted this same way. He never would have left the glory of heaven. He could have said, “You know, I really like it up here. People down there are so mean. I know I’ve got that cross waiting for me, but really, I’m just in no mood to go through that. Besides, I’ve got a lot of other things I can do instead.”

Fortunately for you, Jesus said, “Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.( Matthew 20:28)” 

Provocation being incited to anger. If your temper explodes at a moment’s notice, you’ve got a problem. Never minimize your anger with a statement like, “I get angry a lot, but it’s always over in a few moments.” The bombs that destroyed Nagasaki and Hiroshima only took a couple of moments and their devastation was immense. Anger can be just like that.

If you are ever going to be angry, do it biblically. Be angry without sinning. Only get angry at the things that anger God. Be angry at sin. Get mad at injustice. Then, do something about it. Fix it. At the same time, show incredible grace and compassion to other people.

Keeping Account of Wrong Suffered. Garth Brooks has a song called, We bury the hatchet, (but leave the handle stickin out) The Greek verb represented by this antithesis of love is the negative of a permanent recording of an accounting calculation. It’s like the other person’s offense against you is marked down with indelible ink in your life’s ledger, forever unreconcilable.

If you belong to God through faith in Jesus, the record of your offenses against God have been reconciled. They are no longer there.  The Bible declares that every record of your rebellion has been removed as far as the east is from the west. God has forgiven you and remembers your defiance no more. Ephesians 4:32 therefor exhorts, “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”

Rejoicing in Unrighteousness. Finally, the last negative attribute may just be the most evident of a loveless life. Unfortunately, there is no shortage of examples of people who make bad choices. Even or especially Christians. When you catch news of another “good person” making a bad choice, how do you react? If there is any small part of you that rejoices at the misfortune of another (especially if it is self-inflicted), you demonstrate evidence of lovelessness.

This ugly rejoicing may be expressed in many ways: Hoping that others will slip up or fail, Gossiping or tolerating gossip (by the way, tolerating gossip is cowardice), responding to the news of others’ misfortune with a sense of satisfaction or happiness or justice. 

When love is rushed, love is absent.

It’s easy to define distance in terms of time. You can ask, “How far to the airport?” and the answer could very well be “20 minutes.” You can’t turn that around though…If you ask, “What time can I pick you up for our date?” and the answer will never be, “About 10 miles.” It just doesn’t work that way.

Similarly, people try to define love in terms that just don’t work. A person can ask their spouse, “Do you love me?” and the typical answer might be…

• I bought you flowers a couple of years ago, didn’t I?
• I kiss you every morning no matter how your breath smells
• I pay the bills, don’t I?
• I went to that romantic comedy (or action movie, as the case may be) with you, remember?

People continually try to define love in terms of activities. However, Scripture consistently teaches that i love…true biblical love in all its forms…is always defined as an expression of time.

Read verses 4-7

In these three verses, God beautifully illustrates the components of love. In three verses, God demonstrates the breadth of love like light through a prism. These verses reveal fifteen hues of God’s love. These are fifteen petals of a flower that is love. Alone, they possess limited nobility; together in its whole, it is beauty that possesses its possessor.

In describing each of these fifteen characteristics, Paul always chose verbs instead of nouns. Verbs are expressions of actions. Actions fill time and space, and accordingly, love is always an expression of time. The description is not so much of what love is, but what love does (and does not). Breaking these three verses down into their component parts is akin to taking your day and breaking it down into the hours, minutes, and seconds from which it’s made:

Patience. The Greek word for patience, makrothumeo is a verb that is always used exclusively with people, rather than circumstances. When you love, you must be patient. Patience has to overcome so many differences:

• opinions
• experience
• education
• gender
• background
• expectations
• prejudices
• personal preferences
• and on and on….

You can never successfully be patient in a hurry. You can’t rush it. You can’t force it. You can only develop it from a foundation of love.

Kindness. Kindness is similar to patience because there is a superficial sort of kindness like there can be a superficial sort of patience. A loveless kindness is just like a superficial patience that is nothing more than just putting up with other people. That’s not patience. Being superficially kind isn’t really being kind, either. In fact, the Greek word for kindness is chrestuomai which means a useful, serving, gracious type of kindness. It’s kindness that takes time.

It’s the type of kindness that took Jesus 33 years to express, where he exchanged his holy, eternal, invincible body for a weak, frail, terminal human body. Where he exchanged the everlasting accolades of heaven’s angels for the hate-filled scorn of humanity. Where he exchanged his crown of gold for a crown of thorns, his royal robes for bloody rags, and the throne of heaven for the cross of death.

He took the full measure of time that was required to extend this kindness to you. He doesn’t want you to miss it. And once you claim it for yourself, he empowers you to reproduce it.

That, dear friend, is kindness.